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disappointed_lesbianI'm supposed to be in bed right now, but I missed a couple of steps in my bedtime routine, so here I am waiting on my bedclothes to warm up.
I've been thinking back on unpleasant interactions I've had over my life, interactions in which people were strangely short or hostile or even infantilizing with me, and I'm thinking that I was too young/inexperienced at those times to recognize this behavior as a manifestation of bias, maybe even subconscious bias. Most salient were all the times when people looked at me with something like a mix of shock and confusion when I talked about anything academic or said anything remotely thoughtful/intelligent.
I feel quite indescribably disgusted, sullied, when I think about having been subjected to this behavior. I feel sick and hopeless that even fully grown adults cannot manage their own thoughts and emotions enough to control their bias, racism, hostility.
It's such a disappointment, how trashy and limited people are. Especially in this country, where we have such a rich history of anti-prejudice agitating, such a rich literary tradition of anti-bias scholarship.
But bigots are stupid and don't read, as well as too emotionally immature to be attracted to anything that would alleviate their prejudice, so it's not entirely surprising.
I've been thinking back on unpleasant interactions I've had over my life, interactions in which people were strangely short or hostile or even infantilizing with me, and I'm thinking that I was too young/inexperienced at those times to recognize this behavior as a manifestation of bias, maybe even subconscious bias. Most salient were all the times when people looked at me with something like a mix of shock and confusion when I talked about anything academic or said anything remotely thoughtful/intelligent.
I feel quite indescribably disgusted, sullied, when I think about having been subjected to this behavior. I feel sick and hopeless that even fully grown adults cannot manage their own thoughts and emotions enough to control their bias, racism, hostility.
It's such a disappointment, how trashy and limited people are. Especially in this country, where we have such a rich history of anti-prejudice agitating, such a rich literary tradition of anti-bias scholarship.
But bigots are stupid and don't read, as well as too emotionally immature to be attracted to anything that would alleviate their prejudice, so it's not entirely surprising.
