Dreams Too Positive
Jan. 1st, 2026 11:27 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
disappointed_lesbianThis morning I dreamt about a guy from the asian social networking site. It wasn't even one of the guys I find really attractive; it was the one who has wild hair and looks like he's on steroids. In the dream, I didn't seem to mind his abnormally large arms.
The dream was kind of awkward because we didn't know each other well and neither of us was sure how the other felt. But he touched me, towards the end he finally kissed me, and I liked it. I guess I just wasn't crazy about him. I seem to remember that he felt warm, made me feel warm, but that could very well have been my heater blasting in the bedroom as I slept. At the end of the dream, my older half-sister showed up, and I think we were in her house, although it was a house I'd never seen before. In real life, she died over a decade ago, of colon cancer. In her kitchen, I asked her something about...maybe about the adventure that was going on? That or some business venture she was involved in. She didn't seem surprised to see us in her home.
The dream was split between this scene and some kind of outdoor adventure. I remember seeing some type of wooded vista spread out before me at the beginning of the dream, as if I were watching a nature documentary or the beginning of a movie set in the woods. Or paragliding over the place; the scene was that realistic. I had the sense that other people were there but I couldn't see them; maybe I had only seen them walking away from me at the very beginning of the dream, I cannot quite remember.
I don't know what any of us was doing there, but I had a vague sense that we were exploring and/or looking for something, like we were on some type of quest. But this scene didn't last long, or maybe this was a separate dream that ended, and then I was in a bedroom with this guy, lying on a bed talking to him, looking at the large expanse of skin that covered his arm. Or maybe just seeing his profile picture copy-pasted into the dream by my unconscious. Maybe both. Things are so confused in dreams.
It was a pleasant dream. Pleasant dreams always stand out to me because I feel like shit again when I wake up. I deliberately, albeit not entirely consciously, shift my mind to stressful, unpleasant things. I subconsciously feel like I should mentally stay in battle mode, to protect myself. And sometimes I guess I cannot help but compare the dream to real life. The comparison never favors real life.
I did not like that this dream made me think of dating again. It's not a happy subject. It's curious that it's always a happy subject in my dreams. I'm glad that my subconscious isn't being negatively affected by my not-very-hopeful thoughts on the subject. I have been trying to not think too negatively about it. Maybe that's working more than I'm aware of.
I'm tired today; I didn't get as much sleep as I could have gotten because, when I woke up early, I couldn't think to turn down the heater, as I usually do, so I was too warm to fall back to sleep until after six am, when I had the dream(s).
The dream was kind of awkward because we didn't know each other well and neither of us was sure how the other felt. But he touched me, towards the end he finally kissed me, and I liked it. I guess I just wasn't crazy about him. I seem to remember that he felt warm, made me feel warm, but that could very well have been my heater blasting in the bedroom as I slept. At the end of the dream, my older half-sister showed up, and I think we were in her house, although it was a house I'd never seen before. In real life, she died over a decade ago, of colon cancer. In her kitchen, I asked her something about...maybe about the adventure that was going on? That or some business venture she was involved in. She didn't seem surprised to see us in her home.
The dream was split between this scene and some kind of outdoor adventure. I remember seeing some type of wooded vista spread out before me at the beginning of the dream, as if I were watching a nature documentary or the beginning of a movie set in the woods. Or paragliding over the place; the scene was that realistic. I had the sense that other people were there but I couldn't see them; maybe I had only seen them walking away from me at the very beginning of the dream, I cannot quite remember.
I don't know what any of us was doing there, but I had a vague sense that we were exploring and/or looking for something, like we were on some type of quest. But this scene didn't last long, or maybe this was a separate dream that ended, and then I was in a bedroom with this guy, lying on a bed talking to him, looking at the large expanse of skin that covered his arm. Or maybe just seeing his profile picture copy-pasted into the dream by my unconscious. Maybe both. Things are so confused in dreams.
It was a pleasant dream. Pleasant dreams always stand out to me because I feel like shit again when I wake up. I deliberately, albeit not entirely consciously, shift my mind to stressful, unpleasant things. I subconsciously feel like I should mentally stay in battle mode, to protect myself. And sometimes I guess I cannot help but compare the dream to real life. The comparison never favors real life.
I did not like that this dream made me think of dating again. It's not a happy subject. It's curious that it's always a happy subject in my dreams. I'm glad that my subconscious isn't being negatively affected by my not-very-hopeful thoughts on the subject. I have been trying to not think too negatively about it. Maybe that's working more than I'm aware of.
I'm tired today; I didn't get as much sleep as I could have gotten because, when I woke up early, I couldn't think to turn down the heater, as I usually do, so I was too warm to fall back to sleep until after six am, when I had the dream(s).
