No good choices
Mar. 18th, 2026 11:53 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
disappointed_lesbianI finally checked my email for a new message from my new penpal. It was just a web link, which, he said, leads to a video response he made to my last email. I'm not clicking a link from some random stranger, plus, if he read my whole profile, he knows that I have auditory processing issues, so I don't appreciate him switching from text to audio. The latter is not a big deal; I wouldn't necessarily hold it against anyone because my condition is rare and I can't really expect people to be aware of the details, but, on top of the pseudo-intellectual bullshit, it was a bit much. I logged on and simply told him that I no longer wanted to be penpals. Weight off my shoulders.
I had sushi rice for dinner tonight. It was a nice treat. Usually my rice is jasmine or calrose, and occasionally, basmati.
I'm trying to diversify my intake of greens, so I bought some arugula. It's bitter but it may be ok if paired with tomatoes or tomato sauce.
I'm tired and demotivated tonight because these Taiwanese universities want letters of recommendation even for the program that locks applicants into a post-grad work obligation. Everything is so unfriendly to disabled people. There's no way for me to come up with a reference from a professor or an employer given that I've been out of school and work for over a decade.
The hot flashes are driving me insane. I looked up how long they might last and the answer is years:
https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/menopause-related-hot-flashes-night-sweats-can-last-years-201502237745
I'll be dead long before then due to lack of sleep. Maybe it's the night sweats keeping me awake. They kept me awake when I went to bed without eating. I have no idea whether I'm having enough vitamin d3 and how often I should take some.
I don't want to be in hot ass Taiwan while having hot flashes. My life is marred by a lack of good choices. When I decided to start preparing to move to this country, did I even consider that I wouldn't need warmth anymore after getting my iron intake under control? I'm not sure that anemia was a possibility on my mind back then. Plus, I'm never fully awake and I wasn't back then either.
If I could just come up with the money for a plane ticket, I could do my year of Mandarin school and then figure things out from there. It's all for lack of transportation that I've considered these degree programs. Maybe I should have tried out the sewing gig just to earn enough for a ticket. How loud can sewing machines be? However, the job is seven hours a day; that much time around the noise might be too much.
Maybe I'd trying moving to Ireland after my year of Mandarin. There'd actually be no point in doing a year of Mandarin if my long-term goal was to expatriate to Ireland. I'm not sure that I'm warm enough for Ireland, though. Plus I'm just sick of living around white-privileged people. And I don't want to live in a "friendly" culture either. Plus I heard that Ireland has a housing shortage. Certainly not a place I'd want to be homeless in.
I had sushi rice for dinner tonight. It was a nice treat. Usually my rice is jasmine or calrose, and occasionally, basmati.
I'm trying to diversify my intake of greens, so I bought some arugula. It's bitter but it may be ok if paired with tomatoes or tomato sauce.
I'm tired and demotivated tonight because these Taiwanese universities want letters of recommendation even for the program that locks applicants into a post-grad work obligation. Everything is so unfriendly to disabled people. There's no way for me to come up with a reference from a professor or an employer given that I've been out of school and work for over a decade.
The hot flashes are driving me insane. I looked up how long they might last and the answer is years:
https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/menopause-related-hot-flashes-night-sweats-can-last-years-201502237745
I'll be dead long before then due to lack of sleep. Maybe it's the night sweats keeping me awake. They kept me awake when I went to bed without eating. I have no idea whether I'm having enough vitamin d3 and how often I should take some.
I don't want to be in hot ass Taiwan while having hot flashes. My life is marred by a lack of good choices. When I decided to start preparing to move to this country, did I even consider that I wouldn't need warmth anymore after getting my iron intake under control? I'm not sure that anemia was a possibility on my mind back then. Plus, I'm never fully awake and I wasn't back then either.
If I could just come up with the money for a plane ticket, I could do my year of Mandarin school and then figure things out from there. It's all for lack of transportation that I've considered these degree programs. Maybe I should have tried out the sewing gig just to earn enough for a ticket. How loud can sewing machines be? However, the job is seven hours a day; that much time around the noise might be too much.
Maybe I'd trying moving to Ireland after my year of Mandarin. There'd actually be no point in doing a year of Mandarin if my long-term goal was to expatriate to Ireland. I'm not sure that I'm warm enough for Ireland, though. Plus I'm just sick of living around white-privileged people. And I don't want to live in a "friendly" culture either. Plus I heard that Ireland has a housing shortage. Certainly not a place I'd want to be homeless in.
