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I am in pain. I just took my fourth ibuprofen. The first was about two and a half hours ago. I can't get rid of the menstrual cramps. This is my fault. I started eating wheat again even though I knew it worsens my cramps. My sleep improved (or seemed to) when I had wheat with my last meal, and I started half-mindlessly chasing that extra half-hour or whatever it may have been. No more. I'm down to my last pita today, and I won't be buying any more, at least not in this country. I wouldn't be surprised if GMO wheat was the culprit.
I finally feel somewhat better now. I am coming down off a stress high. My fridge stopped refrigerating and I was afraid that I'd lose a lot of food. Food that I cannot afford to replace. So I called the property manager (which I always avoid doing). He left about half an hour ago. Said that I'd need to clean the fridge if the fridge repair person were to come. Yes, yes of course. I was nervous about having the property manager come in because my apartment isn't the cleanest, it's never terribly clean. I looked around before he arrived and was surprised that it was even presentable for once. I've been doing better with cleaning this past year or so because I stopped over-dosing and wrong-timing melatonin, which was leaving me drowsy and low-energy during the day.
Damn, I just had the longest and deepest nap I've had in probably a decade if not more. And I was comfortable and warm even though I was fully dressed and had nothing but my quilt haphazardly pulled over me.
As I was saying, my apartment is looking much better than it used to, but I hadn't progressed enough to have a presentable fridge, and so the non-working fridge situation took me by surprise. Shit, I just remembered that the fridge repair guy won't be here until Wednesday. I'm going to lose my food. All my tofu, which is my main source of protein. I'm going to have to buy some ice or something. With food stamps. I've got less than twenty cents in my checking account. I'd forgotten all about my accursed phone bill. Every month I waste money on shitty voip service because landline service has become unaffordable. This is yet another reason I want to leave this country: the march of technology is stamping out basic services, such as landline phone service. It's either a mobile phone, voip, or forty bucks per month plus an eighty-dollar converter thingie for landline service.
I was at the dollar store trying to buy cleaning and hygiene supplies this morning, but my debit card wouldn't go through. Turns out all but two dollars and ninety-seven cents had been earmarked for the phone bill. But I didn't know that until I'd stopped at the bank across town. But I absolutely needed laundry detergent, so I went back to the dollar store and used my two ninety-seven to buy the soap plus a new can opener. Then I went shopping for canned peaches and missed the bus home by seven minutes. And that's how I spent eight hours out of town, dehydrated, in pain, and stuck wearing an uncomfortably wet menstrual pad that I wasn't able to change because I couldn't afford pads at the dollar store and because the library had not restocked the charity pads it gives away. My nap and the unexpectedly low price of canned peaches were the highlights of my day.
Since I've been using publicly available wifi to sync my flashcards on the smartphone, I've become aware of how ubiquitous wifi networks are. Ten networks are reachable from any one spot. Half a block away, there are ten different networks. There is no goddamned way that wifi is harmless to animals, except perhaps at so great a distance that the network is all but unusable if it's even detectable. I have my Internet set to Ethernet only, but the ubiquitous Xfinity wifi and my neighbors' networks probably affect me as well.
I've been thinking about making a post about living without internet access. The internet has become so full of user tracking, advertising, trolling, spamming, porn, sociopathy, cracking, and experience-degrading cracking mitigation measures that it's becoming less and less worth anyone's time, but especially my time, as I'm quite protective of my privacy. I find myself unable to even view more and more websites because my vpn is blocked. More and more sites will not allow users to even read a web page without enabling cookies and javascript. Sites are littered with tracking shit from Google and social media sites. Everybody is looking for a way to monetize their garbage content or get internet-famous, and personal authenticity has decreased or at least been drowned out, at least in the online anglosphere. Somehow, French internet articles have the same generic tone that English ones do. The promise of digital social connection has been squandered by the proliferation of personality-disordered behavior and ignorant, hostile, and hateful people. Some of these problems may be less common or less intense on the non-anglophone Internet, but some are not.
So when it comes to possibly moving somewhere that has spotty or limited or perhaps even non-existent Internet access...I wouldn't be missing terribly much. It's survivable.
I finally feel somewhat better now. I am coming down off a stress high. My fridge stopped refrigerating and I was afraid that I'd lose a lot of food. Food that I cannot afford to replace. So I called the property manager (which I always avoid doing). He left about half an hour ago. Said that I'd need to clean the fridge if the fridge repair person were to come. Yes, yes of course. I was nervous about having the property manager come in because my apartment isn't the cleanest, it's never terribly clean. I looked around before he arrived and was surprised that it was even presentable for once. I've been doing better with cleaning this past year or so because I stopped over-dosing and wrong-timing melatonin, which was leaving me drowsy and low-energy during the day.
Damn, I just had the longest and deepest nap I've had in probably a decade if not more. And I was comfortable and warm even though I was fully dressed and had nothing but my quilt haphazardly pulled over me.
As I was saying, my apartment is looking much better than it used to, but I hadn't progressed enough to have a presentable fridge, and so the non-working fridge situation took me by surprise. Shit, I just remembered that the fridge repair guy won't be here until Wednesday. I'm going to lose my food. All my tofu, which is my main source of protein. I'm going to have to buy some ice or something. With food stamps. I've got less than twenty cents in my checking account. I'd forgotten all about my accursed phone bill. Every month I waste money on shitty voip service because landline service has become unaffordable. This is yet another reason I want to leave this country: the march of technology is stamping out basic services, such as landline phone service. It's either a mobile phone, voip, or forty bucks per month plus an eighty-dollar converter thingie for landline service.
I was at the dollar store trying to buy cleaning and hygiene supplies this morning, but my debit card wouldn't go through. Turns out all but two dollars and ninety-seven cents had been earmarked for the phone bill. But I didn't know that until I'd stopped at the bank across town. But I absolutely needed laundry detergent, so I went back to the dollar store and used my two ninety-seven to buy the soap plus a new can opener. Then I went shopping for canned peaches and missed the bus home by seven minutes. And that's how I spent eight hours out of town, dehydrated, in pain, and stuck wearing an uncomfortably wet menstrual pad that I wasn't able to change because I couldn't afford pads at the dollar store and because the library had not restocked the charity pads it gives away. My nap and the unexpectedly low price of canned peaches were the highlights of my day.
Since I've been using publicly available wifi to sync my flashcards on the smartphone, I've become aware of how ubiquitous wifi networks are. Ten networks are reachable from any one spot. Half a block away, there are ten different networks. There is no goddamned way that wifi is harmless to animals, except perhaps at so great a distance that the network is all but unusable if it's even detectable. I have my Internet set to Ethernet only, but the ubiquitous Xfinity wifi and my neighbors' networks probably affect me as well.
I've been thinking about making a post about living without internet access. The internet has become so full of user tracking, advertising, trolling, spamming, porn, sociopathy, cracking, and experience-degrading cracking mitigation measures that it's becoming less and less worth anyone's time, but especially my time, as I'm quite protective of my privacy. I find myself unable to even view more and more websites because my vpn is blocked. More and more sites will not allow users to even read a web page without enabling cookies and javascript. Sites are littered with tracking shit from Google and social media sites. Everybody is looking for a way to monetize their garbage content or get internet-famous, and personal authenticity has decreased or at least been drowned out, at least in the online anglosphere. Somehow, French internet articles have the same generic tone that English ones do. The promise of digital social connection has been squandered by the proliferation of personality-disordered behavior and ignorant, hostile, and hateful people. Some of these problems may be less common or less intense on the non-anglophone Internet, but some are not.
So when it comes to possibly moving somewhere that has spotty or limited or perhaps even non-existent Internet access...I wouldn't be missing terribly much. It's survivable.
